On Wednesday, I went to aquatics, out to brunch with Joe (cinnamon scones from Dozens!), and stopped at Whole Foods. I bought some multi-grain english muffins, Justin's peanut butter, yogurt pretzels, and a bag of mixed nuts and seeds. By 5 AM the next morning, I was in the car and Joe was driving me to the airport. When I landed in Orlando, I met up with my sister, Megan, and my parents. Meg and I took the first rental car and found the nearest Whole Foods so I could get something for lunch. They had a juice bar, so I had an orange-pineapple (my favorite to make at home these days, but I always add a lime) and a turkey sandwich.
And then the weekend progressed. I was thankful I had brought my english muffins and peanut butter for breakfast. I had it all but one day while in Florida and it helped me to feel like I had a tiny bit of control. There were a number of occasions when I didn't have much choice when it came to my food. There were food platters and appetizer buffets and boxes of pizza and bag of chips....all at different times, different days, different meals. At the funeral, there was some food for the family, but by the time I got to it, it was mostly gone. At the reception afterwards, the appetizer buffet consisted of meatballs, mini sandwiches, fruit, and desserts. Later that evening when the whole family was starving, pizza was the only option. The next day before dinner was ready at my aunt's house, potato chips were the only thing available. Now, I'm not complaining about all of this free food I got over the weekend, I'm just painting a picture of how quickly and easy it is for someone to go off track.
For the most part, I was able to forgive myself of these situations where I had little to no choice, but that was made complicated one evening by some unnecessary comments from an extended family member. I did not need my food choices pointed out to me seeing as I was already feeling a little bad about what I was eating. It's difficult to explain to someone that it doesn't matter what I eat on occasion as long as I listen to my body and get back to my own routine when I can. It wasn't like I could walk out of certain situations, get my hands on a juicer and an organic spinach salad. I am acutely aware of my actions (active and eating) these days and I don't need someone to point out my behaviors.
While the comments set me back for about 24 hours (i.e. me ruminating on them and allowing myself to feel guilty and be full of bad self talk), I finally came around to see how lucky I am in the grand scheme of things. I have such a big support system in the rest of my extended family, my immediate family, my friends, my new Green Mountain friends, and most importantly my boyfriend, Joe. Most people aren't as lucky as I am. Joe has been 100% behind me as I have made drastic changes in our food at home and my family and friends check in often and say things like, "You are inspiring me!" and "Keep up the good work!" How can I possibly let one person's comments completely derail me? The only person who would lose then would be me. I am on my own journey and I am the one in charge. No one else. No one else can tell me what to do or how to feel about myself. It's all me.
As a side note, on Sunday, I drove down to Palm Beach Gardens to have lunch with my good friends, Laura and Kristin. Laura lives in Hollywood, FL and Kristin was visiting her from Wisconsin. Both of them are vegan and Kristin is gluten free as well. So we went to this lovely restaurant called Christopher's Kitchen. They offer raw, vegan, dairy free, organic options. It was amazing. I had the Sun Burger which was made up of walnuts and pumpkin seeds on 7 grain bread with avocado, tomato, sprouts, and sauces. And for dessert I had a chocolate mousse that was heavenly. It was great to see them both and to get some ideas for more vegan options. Like I said before, I'm not looking to go vegan, but I am interested in cutting back on my dairy and meat consumption.
Finally, I was only able to get one day in the pool in Florida, so I wasn't as active as I would have liked to be. I have also noticed my energy levels slowly creep down as my eating and activity levels change. (Not to mention the emotional aspect of the weekend.) I am looking forward to getting back onto my path this week. Before I left town, I did put together my meal plan for this week and had my groceries delivered this morning. Tomorrow begins a new day and I plan to make it a good one!
My Uncle Jack, may he rest in peace. (I've forgiven him for liking the Pats.)
My support team: Aunt Sue, Me, Dad, Megan, Mom, and Ellie
(Number one supporter, Joe, not pictured)
Beth, I'm glad you are back, I was missing your blog. I think it is awesome that you have such a huge support network. As for the negative comments, the affirmation "I do this for me and no one can take it away!" comes to mind. And today's This Month Belongs to Me card says,"Every moment is a choice and my next one can be a good one." How appropriate!!
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